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When parents live in different states, co-parenting can feel like an uphill battle. Coordinating schedules, maintaining strong relationships with children, and following custody orders across state lines all require careful planning and often, legal guidance. At Russell Family Law & Litigation, we understand how challenging long-distance parenting can be. Whether your move is due to a job, remarriage, or personal reasons, maintaining a healthy, consistent relationship with your child is absolutely possible. Here’s how to make interstate custody arrangements work smoothly for everyone involved. 1. Understand the Legal Framework Custody issues across states are governed by the Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act (UCCJEA). This statute helps determine which state’s court has the authority (or “jurisdiction”) to make and enforce custody decisions. Typically, the child’s “home state”, where they’ve lived for the last six months, has primary jurisdiction, but there are exceptions to that generality. Because interstate custody issues can become complex, it’s best to work with an experienced family law attorney to avoid enforcement problems. 2. Create a Detailed Parenting Plan A successful long-distance custody arrangement starts with a clear, comprehensive parenting plan. This plan should account for: Visitation schedules (including holidays, school breaks, and summer vacations) Transportation arrangements and who covers travel costs Virtual visitation and communication expectations Emergency procedures and how major decisions will be made The more detailed your plan, the less room there is for confusion or disputes later. 3. Use Technology to Stay Connected Even miles apart, technology makes it easier than ever to stay involved in your child’s daily life. Regular video calls, text messages, or shared photo albums can help maintain emotional closeness. Consider setting up: Weekly video chats using Zoom, FaceTime, or Google Meet Shared calendars for tracking school events or custody transitions Parenting apps (like OurFamilyWizard or TalkingParents ) to manage communication and schedules Consistency is key – even small, regular interactions help children feel loved and supported. 4. Prioritize Quality Over Quantity When time together is limited, make it meaningful. Focus on creating positive, low-stress experiences during visits rather than packing the schedule full. Children benefit most from parents who are emotionally present and attentive. Simple moments like reading together, playing games, or cooking a favorite meal can have a lasting impact and strengthen your bond, even across distance. 5. Be Flexible and Cooperative Life changes. Flights get delayed, school schedules shift, and unexpected events happen. Successful long-distance parenting requires flexibility and mutual respect. Cooperate with your co-parent as much as possible and keep the focus on what’s best for your child, not on “winning” or “losing” time. Flexibility and cooperation can set a positive example for your child and maintain a low-stress environment for them. 6. Keep Communication Child-Focused When communicating with your co-parent, keep discussions focused on your child’s needs, not personal grievances. Avoid using your child as a messenger or sounding board for adult issues. Calm, respectful, and focused communication helps reduce conflict and ensures smoother coordination across states. Interstate parenting arrangements involve unique legal challenges, including enforcement and modification of out-of-state custody orders. An experienced family law attorney can help you: Determine which state has jurisdiction under the UCCJEA Draft or modify a long-distance parenting plan Address relocation issues legally and efficiently Having the right legal support ensures your parental rights are protected and your child’s best interests remain the top priority. At Russell Family Law & Litigation, our family law attorneys have extensive experience helping parents navigate interstate custody arrangements and build parenting plans that work for real families. Contact us today to schedule a confidential consultation and learn how we can help you create a long-distance parenting plan that protects your relationship and your child’s well-being.

Child custody decisions are among the most emotionally charged and impactful rulings in family law. But life changes and sometimes the custody arrangement that once worked well may no longer serve the best interests of your child. In North Carolina, the law allows for custody modifications, but only under certain conditions. Under North Carolina General Statutes § 50-13.7, a court may modify an existing custody order, but only if there has been a substantial change in circumstances since entry of the existing order that affects the welfare of the child. This means the court will not modify custody on the basis of minor inconveniences, parental disagreements, or even one parties dislike of the order that is in place. There must be a significant change that impacts the child’s well-being. Common examples of substantial changes include: A parent’s relocation, particularly if relocating out of state or a significant distance away Changes in the child’s health, emotional stability, or educational needs A parent’s new work schedule that affects their ability to care for the child Recent instances of domestic violence, substance abuse, or neglect Even if you can show a substantial change in circumstances, the court’s focus will be on the best interests of the child, which is the legal standard in North Carolina child custody matters. The judge will examine how the change in circumstances has impacted the child and how any proposed modification would serve the child’s interests. Can Parents Agree to a Modification? Yes. If both parents agree on the changes, they can submit a consent order to the court for approval. The judge will still review the proposed arrangement to ensure it serves the child’s best interests, but the process is much smoother when both parties are in agreement. Contact Us Custody modification cases can be complex, contentious, and emotionally draining. Whether you’re seeking to modify a current arrangement or defend against a proposed change, having knowledgeable legal counsel is critical. Contact our office today to schedule a consultation with an experienced family law attorney and discuss your options for custody modification.