Avoid Court While Going Through a Divorce

Are Court Appearances Mandatory?

How much your presence will be needed in court will depend on the state you live in. In some states, you can settle everything out-of-court and simply submit the documentation. Others, however, require at least a quick court appearance. 

Still, if you and your spouse resolve all the relevant issues beforehand, the court visit should take only about 15 minutes or so of your time. You'll just need to answer a few of the judge's questions for verification purposes, and that's it.

Talking It Over 

In case you and your spouse separated peacefully and are still on good terms, you might want to sit down and have a thorough discussion. Make sure you do your research first and cover all the crucial issues, such as child custody and child support, visitation, property division, etc. 

Afterward, you can hire a lawyer to review and finalize the decisions, as well as prepare a Marital Settlement Agreement. Just a reminder — you can't both use the same one, each party has to have its own legal representation. 

Mediation

For those that can't seem to come to an agreement or find it all a bit too overwhelming, hiring a mediator might be a suitable option. Essentially, mediators are divorce experts that can help you resolve your issues without going to court. 

Firstly, you will need to provide them with the necessary documents and information. Then, you and your spouse will attend regular meetings with the mediator until a mutually beneficial settlement has finally been reached.

There are multiple reasons why mediated divorce is a more preferable option than the contesting one. For one, unlike court proceedings, which can be stiff and exhausting, meetings with the mediator are informal and oftentimes quick and painless. In addition, mediators can be much less expensive than lawyers. Still, you can have your lawyer present in these meetings if that's what you prefer. 

Collaboration 

The goal of a collaborative divorce is also to reach a final settlement. However, in this case, there is no mediator — only you, your spouse, and your lawyers. The four of you will work together to reach an agreement. If needed, other neutral experts can be brought in to help with the decision-making, such as psychologists, accountants, etc. 

Keep in mind that in case you can't resolve your differences and negotiations fail, you'll have to go the traditional divorce route. Most notably, you won't be able to proceed with the same lawyers but rather hire entirely new ones. Aside from bringing about an additional cost, new lawyers will also need to get to know your case in order to represent you in court. Therefore, to avert the unwanted budget and time losses, consider collaborative divorce only if you're 100% sure.

Arbitration

In some states, there also exists an option for divorce arbitration. It's the go-to method for those who just can't seem to come to an agreement. Much like a judge after a trial, an arbitrator or adjudicator makes the final decision.

However, contrasting to the traditional divorce method, arbitration is much less formal. Not only does it allow you to set your own dates and deadlines but also relax the rules of evidence. Thus, with arbitration, you can skip dragging the divorce out for a year, which otherwise wouldn't be possible.

Be that as it may, the arbitrator's decision is final. In other words, you can't file an appeal as you would with a regular court trial. 

Why It's Better to Divorce Out-of-Court 

Alternative dispute resolution comes with many benefits. For starters, it can end up being much less costly than its traditional counterpart. Most people believe that divorces inevitably involve dramatic legal battles and numerous court visits, which we now know is not the case. It's the lawyer's duty to inform you of all of the available options, not just court trials, which happens to be the most expensive one. If your lawyer keeps forcing the court option, they most likely don't have your and your family's best interests at heart.

Another way in which ADR is preferable to contesting divorce trials is because of its flexibility, in every sense of that word. You get a say in almost everything — you pick the judge, the location, and the timeline. 

All in all, by avoiding going to court, you can expect a much more efficient, constructive, and peaceful divorce.