Fathers’ Rights in Custody Cases: What Dads Should Know

Fathers’ Rights in Custody Cases:

What Dads Should Know

Custody Types

Before we discuss fathers’ rights specifically, we should explain the two types of custody courts distinguish — legal and physical.

Legal custody refers to the right to make decisions for and about the child as long as they are underage. For instance, the parent with legal custody decides which school the child will attend, as well as when and whether they need medical care. Legal custody also involves decisions related to extracurricular activities and other aspects of the minor’s social life.

In most cases, courts award joint legal custody to parents, especially when they show a willingness to agree on most issues. Simply put, regardless of who the child lives with, both parents have a say in making decisions. If that proves impossible, the court may intervene and make a ruling in the child's best interest.

On the contrary, a parent with physical custody lives with the child and spends most of the time with them. It’s widely believed that the mother is always the one with physical custody. However, over the past few years, courts have been more progressive.

Nowadays, the norm is that parents share a joint 50/50 physical custody. After all, spending time with both mum and dad is much better for a child's social growth, self-esteem, and school grades.

How Courts Determine Custody Schedules

Typically, courts ask parents to agree on a shared custody schedule rather than enforcing one. After all, if they propose a schedule on their own, it’s far more likely that they will respect it. But when an agreement is not possible, the judges might step in and make a decision instead.

In such cases, courts will consider many factors before deciding. An important one is the distance between the parents’ new homes, as well as how far they live from the child’s school. If the parents live close to each other, a 50/50 schedule is possible and usually chosen by the judge. Sometimes, parents will also agree on an alternating 2-2-3 schedule or a week-on, week-off plan.

However, even when a 50/50 split is impossible due to the distance or one parent’s frequent business trips, there are ways to spend more time with children. They may live with their mother, but that doesn’t mean the father won’t be seeing them frequently. For instance, he could drive them to school, spend his free holiday days with them, or take them to dinner several times a week.

Ultimately, it’s essential to know the children’s calendar, including holidays, school breaks, and extracurriculars. That way, the father can plan his time with his children more effectively, despite not having primary custody.

Use Technology to Help You Plan Your Schedule

Thanks to modern planning tools, agreeing on and keeping track of a custody schedule is much easier. Various family apps allow parents to upload their children’s school schedule and use it for planning quality time. What’s more, you can mark extracurricular activities too. Doing so will help you stay in the loop and never miss any school events, practices, and games.

Aside from school-related activities, parents can also enter doctor and dentist appointments into the app. Considering that both should be as involved in child care as possible, it's a good idea to take turns driving the children there. Since it’s easy to lose track of who is responsible for what, you and your spouse should mark your names next to activities you plan to take on.

Finally, if you can’t see your children frequently due to the distance, modern technology has a solution for you. Use Facetime or Zoom to talk to them whenever possible. It might not be as good as being in the same room with them, but it does give you an opportunity to stay involved in your children’s lives.

Right to Babysit

Even if you don’t have physical custody of your child, your separation agreement will likely have a clause defining the “first right of refusal.” In other words, when the custodial parent needs someone to take care of the child for a few hours, they must offer this opportunity to the other parent first. If the request is met with a refusal, the custodial parent can look for a babysitter or an available relative.

This clause is made to allow non-custodial parents to spend more time with their children, so make sure to take advantage of it whenever you can. After all, your children will likely be happier spending time with you than with a babysitter.

Final Thoughts

Nowadays, courts strive to involve both parents in their children’s lives equally and without prejudice. Thanks to that, good and responsible fathers who want to keep their custody rights certainly won’t be neglected. And while you won’t be spending as much time with them as before the divorce, a carefully thought-out custody schedule should take your wishes and rights into account as much as your spouse’s.