What to Expect From Your First Consultation with a Divorce Attorney

No one ever says their “I do’s” thinking that it will someday end with the two of you admitting “We don’t.” The pain that comes from a failed marriage can be immense, doubly so considering how often one or both parties are subjected to the blame game and public shaming for daring to get a divorce.

This is unfortunate and unfair.

You deserve to be happy. The same holds true for your partner. Seeking a divorce doesn’t say anything about either of you in terms of your worth as people.

What’s more, if it does say something about them, namely that you want to rid yourself of a toxic partner, there’s nothing wrong with that, either. No one should ever shame you into staying in a relationship that’s unhealthy and potentially unsafe. 

Maybe you’ve simply grown apart. Maybe there was cheating or an affair or another breach of trust involved. Maybe your partner is toxic and you need to separate yourself from him or her at all costs. There are any number of reasons why you might find yourself at this point.

But whatever has brought you to the doorstep of divorce, one thing is for certain – you’ll want assistance and assurance as you walk through that door and see what the other side holds.

To that end, here’s what you can expect when you attend your first consultation with a divorce lawyer.

The first thing you can expect when attending any divorce consultation worth its salt is a welcoming, judgment-free environment. Divorces are already hard enough and the public blame game is shameful enough without having to endure such slander from your attorney as well.  Divorce lawyers understand that the past is beyond our control.

It’s what we do here in the present and for the future that counts.

What’s more, some clients are afraid to file for divorce out of fear of physical or emotional retribution. Fear for your life or personal wellbeing or that of your loved ones should never keep you from speaking your truth and pursuing a divorce that can liberate you from a toxic environment. If these are factors in your fears concerning divorce, your divorce attorney will work to first assuage your concerns and then, if necessary, act upon them via legal means. In addition, they can help you find medical treatment, put you in touch with a therapist, or work with child protective services should the need arise.

At this point, you’ll begin telling your story. We’ll touch on some of the most common questions to ask your divorce attorney in a moment. For now, however, what’s important is that you tell them the entire, unvarnished truth of your situation. Your divorce lawyer is committed to helping you, but can only do so insofar as you allow them. Withholding key information until deep into the trial won’t help anyone.

Divulging embarrassing, upsetting, traumatic, or otherwise sensitive information always has the potential to be distressing. That’s why the best divorce attorneys work so hard to win their clients’ trust from the start by creating a welcoming environment and offering a listening ear to their problems.

When you meet your attorney for a divorce consultation for the first time, you are bound to have some questions. In fact, the more you think about it, the more questions are likely to come to mind. Even basic factors like how and when you’ll communicate have to be hammered out from the start. Given how many questions you are likely to have and how broad-ranging they can be, it is often a good idea to make a list of these first questions before you arrive at their premises.

Some of the most common initial questions you are likely to have for your divorce lawyer at your first consultation include the following:

One of the first things you’ll want to establish during your first meeting with your divorce lawyer is the means and frequency with which you plan to contact them. You don’t want to be left wondering when they are going to call you back, and vice versa.

You should not have to pay an arm and a leg to get the just divorce you deserve. It is completely within the bounds of normal operating procedure during an initial divorce consultation to ask your attorney about their fees, and to expect a clear answer in return.

Last but not least, you’ll want to know that you are working with a divorce attorney or family law firm that you can trust. It is thus prudent and fair to follow up on your references question and all the other questions you have asked and make further inquiries about your attorney’s experience. How much experience do they have with cases like this, how have they fared in the past, and how do they plan to use that experience to your advantage?

Divorces can be a difficult time for all involved. By knowing what to expect from the first consultation, however, and knowing the right questions to ask, you’ll be able to get off to a good start in this critical transition period.